That was the headline in the classified section; “Great Deals.” I had found myself without anything else to read while downing my Blue Bunny Lite cup of yogurt the other day, and figured I might as well check out the potential bargains.
Why these were listed under “Great Deals” rather than “Surreal and Outmoded Objects” is beyond me. Here are the listings, verbatim:
BEEHIVE: Red Wing Beehive 4. Perfect. No chips or cracks. $65
Honey, this sounds like a sting operation.
COAL CHUTE: late 1800s, brass, w/shovel & bucket. $95
Well, thank St. Nuggie the shovel and bucket are included! All I need is a coal-burning apparatus and someplace to set the chute. There were good reasons we stopped burning coal in our homes.
RECORDS: approximately 4,400 45’s. Mostly older. $110
4,400 45’s? That is a tsunami of vinyl. Where would you even begin?
SAUSAGE STUFFER: 15 lb. capacity for venison OR OTHERS (caps mine; this is Milwaukee, home of Jeffrey Dahmer). $225 obo
I’m still stuck on “or others.” Hide the dogs and cats!
I know you can go to e-bay and find any number of ridiculous things for sale. But find ing a clump of really odd stuff nestled in the same corner of the neighborhood rag really ups the entertainment value. It’s the classified’s News of the Weird.
Besides, since it’s local I could drive there and save the shipping I’d have to pay on e-bay. My husband does bring home venison, and those sausage stuffers are heavy!